He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Randomize
