How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Randomize
