Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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