I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Randomize
