i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
Randomize
