If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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