Your face is a jimmy john
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
This is the prime rib incident all over again
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Randomize
