Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
