Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
