: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
