no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
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