i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Randomize
