She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
we're so committed to being not committed
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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