remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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