I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize
