How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize