I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
We need a shit load of segways right now
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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