Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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