She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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