The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize