i barfeds in our rink
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
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