i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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