i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
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