guys are not supposed to queef...right?
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Randomize
