ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
