you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
