Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
