this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
she told me i tasted like america
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Randomize
