I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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