next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
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