Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
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