Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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