i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Randomize
