also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
Randomize
