omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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