Christians are straight up FREAKS
did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Randomize
