tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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