Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
