HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize