yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Less talking, more tequila
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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