Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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