Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
please come you make the beer taste better
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
