Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Randomize