hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
