Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
They are going to name an STD after you.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
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