She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
She tied me up with her honor cords...
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
