After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Woke up backwards on a recliner
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Someone signed my nipple.
Randomize
