i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
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