Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
