you turned your livingroom into a bong?
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
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